That’s RSD: 10 Examples of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria in ADHD and How to Untangle from It

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Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is a unique emotional challenge that often accompanies ADHD.

It’s more than just being sensitive to criticism or rejection, it’s an overwhelming, intense emotional reaction that can feel unbearable.

For those with ADHD, even the “perception” of rejection or criticism can trigger RSD.

The good news?

While untangling RSD takes practice, awareness and specific strategies can help you navigate these feelings.

Here are 10 examples of RSD in ADHD, paired with strategies to manage and reframe them:

1. Taking Constructive Criticism Personal

Example: Your boss says, "You need to improve your time management." Instead of seeing this as guidance, you feel like a complete failure and spiral into shame.

Untangle: Pause and remind yourself, “This is feedback, not a personal attack.” Try asking clarifying questions, like, "Can you share specific ways I can improve?", this helps focus on growth rather than blame.

2. Overinterpreting Neutral Comments

Example: A friend doesn’t immediately text back. You assume they’re mad or don’t value your friendship.

Untangle: Challenge your assumptions. Practice self-talk: “Not hearing back doesn’t mean rejection, it might just mean they’re busy.” Distract yourself with something enjoyable while waiting.

3. Avoiding New Opportunities Due to Fear of Failure

Example: You hesitate to apply for a job because you’re sure you’ll mess up the interview or get rejected.

Untangle: Break the task into small steps and focus on effort, not outcome. Celebrate the courage it takes to try, even if rejection happens, it’s a win for showing up.

4. Reading Too Much Into Tone or Body Language

Example: A coworker doesn’t smile at you in the hallway, and you assume they dislike you.

Untangle: Reframe your thoughts: “They might be preoccupied or having a bad day, it’s probably not about me.” Practice mindfulness to ground yourself in the present moment.

5. Overcommitting to Please Others

Example: You say "yes" to every favor or project because you’re terrified of people being disappointed or upset with you.

Untangle: Practice saying “Let me get back to you.” This gives you time to evaluate if the request aligns with your capacity and priorities, rather than responding from a place of fear.

6. Feeling Crushed by Disagreement

Example: A friend says they don’t agree with your opinion, and you immediately feel dismissed or invalidated.

Untangle: Remind yourself that disagreement doesn’t equal rejection. Try thinking, “They value me enough to engage with my ideas, even if they don’t align.”

7. Obsessing Over Past "Mistakes"

Example: You replay a moment when you interrupted someone in a meeting and assume they now think less of you.

Untangle: Practice self-compassion. Ask yourself: “What would I say to a friend in this situation?” Let go of perfectionism by reminding yourself that everyone makes mistakes.

8. Fear of Asking for Help

Example: You need clarification on an assignment but hesitate because you’re worried it will make you seem incompetent.

Untangle: Reframe asking for help as a strength, not a weakness. Remind yourself, “Seeking support shows I care about doing a good job, it doesn’t mean I’m failing.”

9. Taking Jokes Too Seriously

Example: A friend teases you about being late, and instead of laughing, you feel embarrassed and ashamed.

Untangle: Pause and assess the intent. Most jokes aren’t meant to hurt. If it bothers you, consider lightheartedly communicating: “Hey, I know you’re joking, but that stung a bit.”

10. Avoiding Feedback Altogether

Example: You avoid asking how you’re doing at work because you don’t want to hear anything negative.

Untangle: Reframe feedback as a chance to grow, not a judgment of your worth. Approach it with curiosity: “What can I learn from this?” Reward yourself for your bravery in seeking input.

Tips for Managing RSD Overall

- Name It: Recognize when you’re experiencing RSD and label it. Saying “This is RSD talking” helps distance yourself from the feeling.

- Challenge Negative Thoughts: Actively question the validity of your assumptions about rejection.

- Self-Soothing Techniques: Deep breathing, grounding exercises, or mindfulness can help regulate emotions.

- Therapy or Coaching: Working with a professional can help you develop tools for managing RSD.

- Lean on Your Support System: Share your experiences with trusted friends or loved ones who understand and validate your feelings.

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria may feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to control your life.

With the right mindset and tools, you can learn to untangle yourself from its grip, and start showing up in the world with confidence.

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