How Toxic Positivity Contributed to My Burnout
No more pretending everything is fine when it isn’t.
Allow me to wonder.
Not too long ago, I heard about the term toxic positivity.
At first, I didn’t understand it.
Let me explain.
For a very long time, I tried very hard always to be positive.
I explored spirituality, different religions, and belief systems, all in an attempt to make sense of life.
I tried to leap from joy, joy, joy over the deeper valleys of despair and depression.
I masked to survive.
I tried to fit in.
I tried not to be excluded from society.
I have experienced burnout many times in my life, and I still navigate my energy and mood on a daily basis.
I have great tools and teach others about emotional regulation.
However, learning that positivity can become toxic has been a golden key for me.
Today, I allow myself to have low-energy days and low moods.
I allow them to stay a little longer.
I move through them more gently, without self-blame or guilt.
As a coach, I naturally prefer to be happy, positive and focused on possibilities. I often see potential where others see darkness.
But there is a real sense of relief in simply accepting that today I might need two double espressos before I feel like going for a run or turning on my computer.
Menopause is different!
My inner biology feels more stable than when I was bleeding and hunting men 🙈
These days, I just follow the moon cycle and plan my life and training around it.
The full moon is for higher energy.
The new moon is for lower intensity, reflection and rest.
I teach my teenager to take care of herself too.
To honour her inner cycles.
Her moods.
The rhythms of nature.
No more forced positivity.
No more pretending everything is fine when it isn’t.
And no more toxic positivity.
Well, except for those moments when I am hired to perform a role.
Sometimes we put on a uniform and temporarily tuck away our real feelings because the situation requires it.
But I am grateful that most of the time, I work from home.
And most of the time, I get to be myself.
